"Be careful."

You will be naked and alone in an unfamiliar room where you will be massaged by a blind Chinese man, whose level of visual imparity is questionable. This was one of the various impressions I was given about the famed “Blind Massage.” After arriving in China, I immediately began to investigate where to go for a cheap massage. In case there’s any confusion about a westerner looking for a cheap massage in Asia, I mean the kind that’s needed to repair your body after 30 hours of traveling.
Shortly after beginning my quest, I was informed of the blind massage, preformed by a blind person, whose visual disability supposedly translates into heightened massaging ability. With my current Mandarin deficiency, I have enough trouble ordering meals, so the prospects were slim for finding out exactly what a blind massage would entail. Instead, I had to rely on the well intentioned, but incredibly confusing and conflicting accounts from Chinese English speakers of various skill levels. For example, one of these accounts was described in the opening sentence of this story. So, on the scheduled day of this event, I was ambivalent, to say the least.
We headed out in a party of 3, consisting of El Pro, (aka LP), Guen, (a fellow American English teacher), and Penny, our assistant/ translator/ mandarin instructor. The Americans agreed to wait down the block, while Penny inquired about the actual cost of the massage, versus the foreigner cost we would likely be quoted otherwise. Before parting at the corner, Penny left us with the encouraging last words; “He can see something, so be careful.” This was comprehended as; "He may not be fully blind, so don’t take off your shirt in front of him."
So, we reluctantly enter the premises, where several seemingly visually impaired Chinese people are milling around, and quickly led into a side room with 3 bamboo massage tables. Shortly after, 2 blind Chinese men enter the room, followed by a blind Chinese woman who feels her way towards my table and locates me by palming my scalp. She commences her massage, which initially consists of her rocking my body back and forth across the bamboo mattress. At this point, I begin to wonder if I’ve just become the latest victim of a con that gets pulled on every naive foreigner who comes to China. Eventually, she finds her groove and starts to relax my muscles and my paranoia. The next 40 minutes are the most relaxing I’ve had in China, and she even throws in a few chiropractic maneuvers along the way. When it was all said and done, it wasn't the best massage I’ve ever had, probably not even in the top 50. Still, its something I’m unlikely to forget anytime soon, and a bargain at 35 quai , or about $5.